You know, there are just some days when I realize that my misanthropy is a direct result of entropy. Take tonight, for instance. I have been incredibly stressed out due to the fact that there is just too much work to do and that I may as well give up on weekends. However, after a few sips of pineapple rum (not many, mind you, but just enough to calm the nerves), I was feeling good enough to begin grading the papers.
However, a few papers in, Jeremy and Jerome decided to leave to a friend's house. I always worry about them when they go out without me to chaperone because I'm afraid they'll drink too much. Also, I get quite lonely by myself, which is pretty good: a lonely misanthrope.
So speaking of misanthropes, the essays I'm grading are on Johnathan Swift. Side note: I hate that name Johnathan. Never know how to spell it. Not even sure if this spelling is correct. After grading several, I decide to take a break. But before that, I manage to have conversations with three friends. Those went well enough.
I play video games during my break. This is the point at which I become involved in quite the convoluted texting situation involving me, Jerome, and Jeremy, via Jeremy's phone. Then Jerome calls to check on me, and probably because he misses me (I certainly was missing him already by that point). It's hard to play Call of Duty while on the phone, but I managed better than I usually do.
So randomly, my very first boyfriend from when I was 12 starts chatting with me, which is always a good time. Since we were childhood friends, we don't let a little thing like a 7.5 month relationship get in the way of our friendship. It's beautiful, really. He's a gamer too, so we start talking about Call of Duty. Then, Jeremy, who is now intoxicated, starts texting me about Pokemon, blowing that he's gonna beat me at it, as his texts progressively become harder to read and follow. Ross, in the meantime, confesses to me that he is also quite drunk, and Jerome admitted to drinking two beers early in the evening, but is waiting them off so that he can drive home. I'm sure he's fine to drive. Flattered by the two nerdy conversations I'm having with guys, and concurrently depressed by the fact that both these conversations were most likely induced by alcohol, I get up to add more pineapple rum to my glass. Not much, mind you. And come back to see that Ross now has a crescent moon by his chat name, meaning he's probably passed out or something.
Whilst we were still chatting, Ross was talking to me about marriage. Not with him, but with Jerome. He had caught wind of yesterday's April fool joke and took it seriously. Then he started asking if we were going to get married anytime soon. Perhaps I should talk to Jerome about this, as his sister and I were just having a conversation about this earlier. Everyone I talk to seems to think I am going to get married soon, or should. And this has nothing to do with the April fool.
It's rather awkward to talk to your first boyfriend about the possibility to marrying your current boyfriend, even though your first boyfriend is a great guy who will actually listen and communicate, etc. Even if more years have passed since that relationship than you had lived when the relationship began. There's just something about that first love, and I know that I loved Ross. It's even more awkward knowing that Ross is single.
Another interesting side note: On Ross' 27th birthday, I will have been with Jerome for one year.
So here it is, 1:30 in the morning. I need to get back to grading Swift papers. Somewhat ironically, this has been the slowest grading session ever. I'll responsibly sip my pineapple rum and grow more misanthropic and sad as the evening progresses.
foggy morning ..
3 days ago