I really despise certain things about being a woman (most of them, really). And having that pesky Aunt Flo is at the top of that list. It usually doesn't bother me that much, but for some reason, it's really messing with my emotions tonight. I've been irritable, sad, and now depressed. The really bad thing is the depression. I had a problem with depression in high school and I would get to where I literally didn't want to do anything. Kind of like how I feel right now. Tonight, I didn't even want to blog. It's just something I'm doing until the allergy meds kick in and knock me out so I can get some sleep. Well, that and because as I recall, I tend to do my best writing when I'm feeling the worst.
But tonight might be an exception.
I'm hoping that I come out of this madness tomorrow. In the evening I'm supposed to have dinner with my cousin and a friend. Before that, who knows. If I'm still depressed, I probably won't be doing much of anything. Unless I start writing again. Or sleep all day. My boyfriend was kind of hinting that he'd like me to come to his place tomorrow, but, once again, if I'm in a nasty mood, I'd rather him not see the bad side of me. Goodness knows he's already seen enough bad sides of me. It's amazing he even still likes me.
If I didn't live with other people, I'd probably do something really crazy like cook a box of macaroni and cheese at 2am. Or play my guitar. Or play Fallout 3 and make really bad decisions just for the heck of it. Or maybe even do some cross-stitch. I haven't done crafts in a long time. But not because I really want to do any of these things; rather to take my mind off the fact that I'm depressed for no reason and, once again, have persistent insomnia.
However, one thing that makes me really happy is the fact that I am most likely going to order an Xbox 360 tomorrow. This means more gaming potential, since I already have the PS3. And most of my friends and my boyfriend's friends, and our shared friends have the 360. Plus, he has them both. I think my mood just improved a micrometer.
Now I'm off to make myself some late-night nachos.
foggy morning ..
3 days ago